


The Afterlife is a Free Pass

by i_cant_pick_just_one_fandom



Category: Ghosts (TV 2019)
Genre: Angst, Eventual Romance, Eventual Smut, Fluff and Smut, Ghosts, M/M, Pining, Pre-Canon, Romance, Sexual Tension, Smut, The Captain is Gay (Ghosts TV 2019), it's not done
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-21
Updated: 2019-05-21
Packaged: 2020-03-09 07:52:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,326
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18912703
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/i_cant_pick_just_one_fandom/pseuds/i_cant_pick_just_one_fandom
Summary: Set just after Julian's death.After waking up (or something similar) after his death Julian meets his new permanent housemates. One catches his eye but it seems this will be harder than his usual pursuit.





	The Afterlife is a Free Pass

His eyes opened and he saw that he was still there.

_That’s funny… I could have sworn…?_

It had been cold.

Well. Actually, very hot but then… suddenly he felt cold.

_How strange._

“Hello!”

Julian jumped and turned around, finding a small man right behind him.

“Who the hell are you? What are you doing here?”

The man’s already smiling face seemed to smile even more, but in a sort of sympathetic way…

“Well, my name is Pat. I wanted to be the first to welcome you here. I’m not really in charge, that’s the Captain. Or at least, that’s what we let him think” The man, Pat, chuckled to himself.

Julian narrowed his eyes. “What do you mean ‘Welcome me here’? You’re the one who’s new here, I’ve been here with- well I’ve been here with someone for a while now”

“Here is not the house” Pat brought his hands together and wrung them slightly “I probably should have been a bit clearer on that one, sorry. Here is- well you see- what happened to you is- “

“Spit it out man!”

“You died. Sorry. I mean you weren’t killed or anything if that’s what you’re worried about. Although I suppose she did have a hand in it, but it’s not like she seemed to be trying to hurt you. At least not in that way. What am I telling you this for, you were there, you’ll remember it? And it’s not like I even saw it happen I went to calm down Lady Button. She was not happy at- “

Julian cut in “Woah woah woah! What do you mean I died? I’m clearly not dead, I’m right here!”

Another apologetic smile was flashed his way.

“This is preposterous. This is obviously some prank, Milligan put you up to this didn’t he?” Julian began laughing to himself. This was all beginning to make sense now.

“No, sorry. I don’t know a Milligan.” He seemed to think for a moment “Here, I’ll show you”

Pat began to walk towards the wall. And suddenly… he was gone!

Julian blinked hard. _I must have taken something. Yes, that’s it. This is a trip, just a bad trip._ But Pat came back again… through the wall.

“See?” He smiled again “Now you try”

Julian walked slowly, as if in a dream. He barely noticed his legs were moving beneath him, he was too baffled. The wall got closer and he knew that in a moment he would walk head-first into a wall and look like a fool. He closed his eyes.

And kept walking. And walking. _Surely, I’ve reached the wall by now?_ He opened his eyes.

“Gaahhhhhhh!”

A room full of people was in front of him with one of them being about 2 inches from his face. He jumped back and saw that there was a peasanty looking one with a blackened face; some sort of ape looking fellow; a woman who seemed to be straight from A Room with a View; a far too cheerful seeming woman in a purple frock; someone in a _very_ convincing headless Tudor costume; John Keats?; and right in front of him seemed to be some sort of general, or at least someone pretending to be a general because the uniform looked rather old.

“Who?” He spluttered “Who are all of you?”

“Well” came a voice from behind him “This is Kitty. That’s Humphrey over there with the head.” Pat came around him and began walking to each person in turn “Mary over there – give him a wave Mary” Mary waved “This is Lady Button. Thomas Thorne over here. This is Robin.” He had reached the front of the group “This right here is the Captain and, just in case you didn’t catch it, my name’s Pat.”

“Right,” said Julian. “Hello.”

A chorus on greetings came his way, some seemed more reluctantly given than others.

He shook his head, _pull yourself together man_. “Now look here, what are you all doing here? No one else is supposed to be here this week?”

“We’re always here” one of them said. Kitty? Maybe?

“We’re dead. Like I said earlier” Pat looked at him with sympathy again “And so are you remember? We all died here, so we all stay here. And umm, it seems like you will now too”

“Will you stop saying I’m dead!” he’d had enough “I’m not dead!”

“You just walked through a solid wall?”

“And there was the whole thing with the rope”

“That wasn’t rope, that was just a belt”

“What’s a belt?”

“Steady on everyone!” the Captain spoke for the first time since Julian had walked into the room. He gave a barely visible gulp and turned to the others “Now. I think we can all see that Julian here is a bit worked up. It’s best if only a small force remains here and the rest of you go off somewhere else so he can cool off. Pat, you stay here, everyone else, dismissed.” Everyone grumbled and walked off in different directions. And through the walls.

Julian gave himself another shake.

“Now look here” Julian’s attention was brought back to the man in front of him. “You don’t think you’re dead then.”

“No, I don’t” said Julian “Because if I was dead, I would be dead, not hanging around Button House with a bunch of weirdos in fancy dress”

“Prove it.”

“Now, Captain don’t do that again.” Pat inquired the man.

The Captain maintained eye contact with Julian. “No, no Pat. If he wants to go down this route of denial, I’ll humour him.”

“Alright” said Julian “How do you want me to prove it, you ignoramus?” He took a step forward, taking advantage of his height.

Eyes narrowed but with a small smirk the Captain said, “Pick up that cup over there.”

Julian scoffed and turned away from the man. “Is that it? Alright.” He walked over to the cup in question and reached towards it. He confidently moved his hand around the cup and saw his hand move straight through the cup while a feeling of nausea swept over his arm. Quite how nausea can be felt in the arm alluded him, but he was sure that was what it was. He tried to pick up the cup again. But once again was met with the same outcome.

“No”

He kept pawing at the cup, but nothing would happen.

“No, no, no, no, no, no, _no_.”

“Julian!?”

“Samantha?” Julian straightened up and turned around. “Samantha is that you?”

“Julian, oh my god! Are you okay? Julian!” He walked through the door back to the room he was previously in and saw… _my god_.

“Don’t be dead! Oh my god, don’t be dead!” Samantha was leaning over his body, obviously having just regained consciousness. Leaning over _his body_ while Luke seemed to be looking for a phone to call for help.

“Oh my god.”

He turned around and found himself face to face with the Captain, Pat standing at his shoulder, looking on in concern.

“Is that enough proof for you then? That you really are dead I mean?” The Captain snapped at him with an eyebrow quirked, “Or would you like to keep going?”

“Fine” he said. “You win. I’m dead. Happy now, you prick?”

The Captain’s mouth twitched up at one side, then he turned sharply and marched out of the room.

Now Pat was coming over to him with a reassuring look on his face. “He’s not usually like that. Well, not always. But there’s plenty of us here to talk to besides him. Lady Button might take a bit of time though, she wasn’t happy with how her house was being used. Thomas was keeping Kitty away from the rooms you were in, so she’ll probably be fine with you.”

“Right. Yes. Thank you, Pete.”

“It’s Pat”

“Yes, of course” he gave him a politician’s smile and walked out of the room.


End file.
